Happiest of holidays everyone! Merry Titty Tuesday xx
I couldn’t decide which track to use today so I decided on three (there’s a lovely remix of Nina Simone by Fink at the end).
I just returned from Mexico with my sister, Rachel and friend Aubrey. It was an amazing holiday. Below are a few pics. There are more on my Instagram (Lovatron).
Mayan ruins of Chichén Itzá, Mexico
It’s amazing what colorful painted walls, friendly smiles, ocean, sunshine, dancing, adventures and good company can do for the soul. I don’t know about you all, but 2012 hasn’t been an easy year by any means. I’ve lost much. I lost a part of myself. I continuously discover things that are ready to come to the surface– ugly things that lie hidden under masks of forced positivity or “illusions of grandeur” or the zombie trance of the sometimes exhausting NY daily grind. This year I have been ALL. Over. The. Place. If I had a paint brush attached to my brain reflecting this past year, my canvas would have turned to a muddy brown.
But the Universe has a way of holding you when you feel you’re going to break. For all of the negative things that have happened, I’ve been blessed with amazing friends, my job, travel and kisses of wisdom along the way. These experiences have shown me so much about myself and increased my faith and trust. It’s okay to walk through the pain and cry and freak out sometimes and it’s okay to feel embarrassed and ashamed. It’s okay to be angry and to feel stupid and vulnerable. Your true friends and/or family will always be there for you. And when you feel happy and free and the laughter brings tears to your eyes, you appreciate it so much more. Life is beautiful.
I really wanted to mend something but I finally realized that I don’t need to– especially when the thing that is broken might not ever be fixed and I’m okay with that now. You can’t control everything in your life. You just can’t. Some things are better left where they are. I don’t want to be bitter or unforgiving. I don’t want to cause trouble. I don’t want to blame. Sometimes we want others to see our point of view. They might not. It’s alright.
I have been blown away with a few relationships this year that have renewed my faith in the human race. They truly helped me heal and survive 2012. I hope you know who you are. I love you so, so much!
For 2013, manifest what you want. Say what you need. Write it down and stick it on your wall so that you see it every day. Work toward your goals. Achieve them. Believe in yourself because this is it. If you don’t do it now, another year will pass you by. Trust in your abilities and if you’re not as skilled as you would like to be, practice, take classes, find a mentor, teach yourself- become better. Have a friend hold you accountable because it’s easy to get tired and slip. Spend quality time with people who truly love you and who want to see you succeed– people that you respect.
Don’t waste life. Be patient. Don’t worry. We’re all going through it. Cheers!
Peace OUT 2012. Merry Holidays little doves <3